a face full of expression and
brilliant animation as emotion
has arms and legs and a voice,
loud and amplified,
shiny, sparkly, springy
buoyant words

expressions for words
hands are talking,
a language of wrist snapping,
air moving,
happy dancing fingers are excited
and you know it because it’s all electric.

hips play a game of coy, shy and suggestive
sexy, effeminate and juxtaposed against a masculine backdrop
of delicious contradiction well dressed,
well groomed,
no other word but pretty will do here

Tags: december 2011

many more things

skin delivered, smooth terrain for
hungry hands, thirsty eyes
drinking blue framed by dark, looking in,
looking beyond

knowing comfort, giving comfort,
coming back around
each turn, each yield
each second guess of wonder

did you know of the hope to come
connection sealed into bodies reaching
arching one over another and i
found comfort in the pause between us

i found sanctuary in providing it,
in limbs relaxing into others, in the skin we shared,
the skin we marked, owned and left black, blue and yellow
each day fading from the past yet refreshed anew

energy held, fleeting at times, yet consistent
i was consistent.
hungry approached, solid and unwavering in my own self knowledge
the clear lines of my heart, mind and body remained intact
remained unperforated yet permeated and open to them

Tags: brooklyn

hopeful excitement
unrevealed journey
incandescent crossroads to forge
stillness in order to connect

sitting between teetering inroads
building curiosity meets anticipation
thrill sits as precipice in my throat
hesitation is mediation; moderation to keep me on the ground

blessings come multiple disguise
asking, asking, accepting, grasping,
uncover, reveal, open, shine
forgiveness, allure, exploration, decision

landing off the places I have been before
new ground to move across
peaceful, inner self solidarity in unfoldable measure
a full embrace; stories told, nothing for loss

piercing and immediately poignant
a natural flow moving, pulling like taffy,
forming, expanding, sticking to me
an adhesive of tangible, forceful and immediate gravity

the attraction dripped off my senses,
hesitation erased, quickly replaced by truths teetering in my thoughts
then words spilling off my lips
wanting to be caught up to the boldness resting between us 


                              surely as your hands made contact, my sensations tumbled.

more. 

                  don’t let it end here.


I couldn’t let it end there
I wasn’t about to even pause
your questions, my anomalous self-disclosure
excited calm, open connections made no flaws

syncing skin beautiful touch
desire clenching my throat and chest
your affect heavy and thick like purple,
my response strong and fluid like press.

Tags: brooklyn

excitement
staring down at me
a blended feeling wrapped in a package I have not fully seen

wonder awe wonder awe
where might this turn
knowing way gives unto way
never prepared
always ready

chemistry
that electric and energetic pull
such a drug
such an intoxicant

touch
delight
contact
taking up
giving through


show me show me show me

i will take you
there is no rejection here
music to my ears
a special kind of boi
one like you

colliding energies
even the idea excites
raises awareness
opens a door
inviting a mystery of sorts

you
bandwidth fits attraction
is masculine you
this could be trouble
a very good kind of trouble

Sir

up against bodies firm
muscles oh yes muscles
delight anticipation

slow slow slow
not too fast
enjoy relish delicious

Over as in beyond, how does that apply to relationships?

Do you ever really move beyond someone or do you just divert paths...what was once side by side becomes deviating trails - each to create a singular path between different trees, around and back under the same sun.

Or no - since apart, a-p-a-r-t, means "not whole" or unhinge...what does it mean really?

A consious choice to not have daily contact, to not elevate anothers existence into the forefront of awareness - what about emotions?

Just a pool of collected raindrops ever falling from the storm of connectivity.

Do we ever really come clean away?

Impressions are always made; lives touch lives and we are never the same but always the same two-fold.

GROWTH...a journey, a search for self, solid always appealing. So many endings - so much letting go, how loss brings gains has become clear; I am just tired of the struggle of finding comfort and releasing it back.

But hanging on tight is not an option either.

I cannot "contain" another, only offer temporary shelter, momentary safety - each has their own plight for sanctuary, their own search for what fits inside the breath and bones of a singular soul.

I offered an anchor, but the waters were cloudy, unsettled - self counldn't see self - the imagery aside; new lands awaited discovery and it is a solo venture.

Tags: relationships

red
priveledge
knotted and frayed together

pulls you
but never
grasping net


I wanted to feel bright


...

Tags: write-o-rama prompt

Taking a real close look at my heart and pride. Wondering of my own limitations, sublimations, realizations. Bringing myself to center once again. I feel fallen, dislodged, and disorienated, to the progress I have worked so hard for.

Can I really exist within a poly framework, will I thrive here? I feel weak and triggered and insecure - I feel like I might not make it here in this land of multiple. I am not sure how to feel okay and not hurt. Do I want the security of monogamy - just one real, deep relationshp in which to share my heart? A safe place to try on all these new skills I have gained where I do not have to focus on this constant thought of others.

I am a ship lost a sea right now in this terrain I cannot control...

Is that the fundamental struggle here - the lack of control I feel, the risk, the gamble that they will enjoy someone else more, than I am not good enough, not hot enough...is that the root?

Perhaps.

How do I let go here? Trust in myself to be healthy and centered.

Surrender.

Why does it all feel so heavy and daunting and dark? Do I let go altogether, admitting I am not able or do I persevere to at least attempt to work through the feelings that come. The jealousy, the insecurity, the obsessiveness, the spite I feel. The wronged I feel. How do I just leave things be to exist while at the same time honor my heart, my feelings, my existence...just how I am...in this moment and always.

It would be.

BE.

It would be a purple flower full of bloom, edges and softness. It would demand your attention, it would look different each time it was displayed. It would grow and it would arch to the light. It would have thorns some days and soft, gentle leaves others.

It would be.

BE.

It would be a purple flower full of bloom, edges and softness. It would demand your attention; it would look different each time it was displayed. It would grow and it would arch to the light. It would have thorns some days and soft, gentle leaves others.

It would be touchable.

It would be untouchable.

It would be beautiful and fragrant and wilted and inert. Some days lavish, others bent over and thirsty...it would be thirsty...for liquid and light as well as depth and darkness.

It wouldn't have a name all called it; it would depend on one's relationship and familiarity to it.

It would always be visible and colorful, but uncertain and ambiguous.

It would beg for question and study and it would welcome innocent curiosity of every child asking their parent what kind of flower it is.

It would grow in urban terra cotta deck pots as much as it would grow wild in the mountains on a rocky slope.

It would beg your attention, command your touch, and look delicious tucked behind your ear.

Tags: butch voices conf workshop prompt

Catching on the brim of an overflowing cup, my existence is about to boil over into the unknown overflow of what is to come. No longer contained by the parameters and former packages of a reality left behind, I have not only gone and changed the rules, I am not playing the game anymore. Off the field and into the open realm of the new, real and unseen.

I know I haven't been here before.

I know I want to be. Right Here.

I sunk down to the depths of my own containment, I have examined the fall and I have climbed so that I can rise to the heights of potential.

Realized potential.


Strive. Persevere. Relish. Readiness.

Each piece I let go of frees me of the weight I've carried, no longer needed baggage. Safe yet heavy reminders of places I no longer wish to dwell. The location of my efforts rest in the highest will of nature - not of my own.

Enter here.

This time and for all time.